Creatures in the Night

On Friday night, Doug and I stopped at a Hilton Garden Inn in Tennessee a little bit before midnight central time.  I had researched the hotels in the area and although the one we picked was under construction, it still had very good reviews.  We were both exhausted when we checked in and went straight to our room.  When I opened the door, I noticed the room smelled very musty.  I wasn't completely surprised as we had had moisture and humidity problems every time we stayed somewhere in Tennessee.  I found the thermostat and saw that the batteries were dead.  Thinking that I could still get the air conditioner to turn on manually, I walked toward the unit.  Running out from under the bed was the largest cockroach that I had ever seen.  I instantly grabbed my luggage and headed toward the door apologizing to Doug for leaving, but there was no way I was going to stay in a musty, smelly room with cockroaches.  He agreed immediately. The front desk clerk was shocked to hear about the roach and apologized profusely while she found us a new room on a different floor.  The second room definitely needed some upgrading, but it didn't smell and was free of cock roaches.  

After Doug and I left Saturday morning, I decided to contact Hilton to let them know about the cockroaches and to also tell them that I would have expected more than just a room change.  If it had been earlier in the night, we actually would have cancelled our reservation and switched hotels. I explained all of this to the customer service representative, and they promised me that we would hear from the hotel within three days.

Since today was the third day and I had heard nothing, I contacted Hilton again.  The representative said that I should have received an email, but since I hadn't, they read it to me.  The hotel replied that they had switched us rooms, had an exterminator come out within two days and would do better in the future.  The email actually made me more frustrated than I had been when I saw the roach.  I wasn't looking for much, but a free breakfast or a 10% discount would have been nice.  Customer service gave me a corporate phone number to call and thankfully the woman who answered took my concern seriously, instantly apologized and offered us 20,000 points which would go a long way toward another room.  I couldn't believe it.  I hadn't been pushing for compensation and really just wanted someone to listen to me.  I ended the phone call knowing that I had not only been heard but appreciated as well.  

\

It Feels Great to Talk About It

I have spent a lot of time going to therapy these past two years to help with the stress of the past five.  There have been countless life changing events that have occured, and it has felt great to have someone to talk to about them.  It is also nice that I have had the same therapist every session, so I haven't had to reexplain myself or go over the same situation multiple times with different people.   I decided in August that I wanted to change my appointments to every three or four weeks instead of twice a month. When I made that change, I almost considered stopping therapy all together, but in the end, I am very glad that I didn't.  I have found that although I have learned to cope with stress a lot better than I did before, life continues to throw difficult challenges in our path, and I am not ready to face all of them on my own yet. 

The other benefit from going to therapy is that I have been able to talk with her about situations from my past that pop up in my mind from time to time.  I don't dwell on them but would love to get rid of the memories altogether.  Mostly, I would just like to stop blaming myself for things that I did not do.  I have a habit of thinking that everything in life that goes wrong is my fault even when I could have done nothing to stop the situation. Hopefully, I can learn to let those feeling go and move forward.  Guilt is a terrible emotion when you let it control your life.  I have learned why I always feel guilty, now it is time to stop the irrational feeling and look forward to a happy future.

  

Glad to Be Home

It was so nice to be home after being gone for ten days.  I was definitely tired, but thankful for a wonderful time in Indiana.  Today, I made an appointment to see my family doctor as a follow up to my hospital visit.  I unpacked everything that we brought back with us.  I started sorting through the items that our family wanted to put on Facebook Marketplace and eBay.  I did several loads of laundry, sprayed the weeds, watered my plants and appreciated a day to catch up. 

I absolutely love visiting the boys, but it definitely takes a lot out of me.  I have a month before we travel again and thankfully, we will be flying then which will shorten our travel time immensely.  I love my new Pilot, but three long drives to the Midwest and back in a four-month period were a lot.   

Bishop Fulton Sheen

Doug and I did not get to see Brett and Karen last weekend, but we didn’t mind.  We were just super excited that they were able to go on an adventure of a lifetime. Last spring, Brett told me that he and Karen were going to forgo a big first anniversary trip to attend the beatification of Bishop Fulton Sheen this past week in St. Louis. He was not only one of Brett's favorite bishops but would also become the first American-born bishops to be beatified in the United States.

Over the summer, I helped Brett and Karen several times with their trip - first, navigating the craziness of securing tickets for the mass, and then looking at several different hotels that were close to the beatification and were also affordable for their mini vacation. Brett even went over his plans for St. Louis with me, hoping to include the Gateway Arch and the St. Louis Zoo along with the religious ceremony.  I was glad to be a part of their planning as I know how much it meant to them.  

Brett and Karen both texted me multiple times throughout the week with pictures and their thoughts on the beatification. I truly appreciated their words of thanks for helping them plan this trip and was delighted to see how happy they were attending it. I was also glad to hear that they not only made it to the arch and the zoo but found several other places to visit such as the Museum of Illusions as well. All of it sounded wonderful, and I loved their pictures and videos. I couldn’t believe the number of priests that attended. I thought the seventy-five at Nathan‘s ordination were a lot, but Karen said it took over an hour for the priests' procession to the beautification. I am thrilled that all went well, and although I missed seeing them this weekend, I wouldn’t trade time with them for the memories that they made together this past week for anything.

Not So Unexpected News

Doug and I left at halftime last night.  The game was still close at 12-0, but we knew that if we stayed until the end, we wouldn't get out of the stadium before 11 p.m.  That would leave us very little driving time tonight and a longer trip today.  There was another benefit of leaving early.  I would no longer have to listen to the crowd around me scream negative comments at Josh Hoover.  No, he is not Fernando Mendoza, but very few people are.  Blaming our poor offensive performance on just him was not only wrong, but ignorant.  It completely ignored the fact that our offensive line isn't as strong as last year's team.  I had definitely had my fill by the time we left, but still very hopeful that the Hoosiers would hold on and win the game against a much better Northwestern team than anyone had predicted. Thankfully, the Hoosiers did hold on and ended up winning 29-23.  It was a tense game that kept Doug and I wide awake all the way to Tennessee.  

We left this morning from our hotel at 8 a.m. glad that we would be able to make it to Ocala by nightfall.  On the trip, I decided to call my dad.  Both Cameron and I had talked to him yesterday and realized that something was wrong.  My cousin, Jeannette, kept texting me as well to see where I was and when we were leaving for Florida.  I realized that was a sign but knew that even if there was something wrong, I couldn't do too much about it.  I had to get back to Florida and see my family doctor about my heart racing last weekend.  

My hunch was correct as I found out this morning that my dad was trying to help my mom get into the hearing aid doctor's office and accidentally knocked her walker over, breaking my mom's shoulder.  My mom was in the hospital and would possibly need surgery.  Either way, it would be a long recovery.  I was sick to my stomach when I heard the news but not completely surprised.  Something inside of me told me this past week that there was a high chance that my mom would end up breaking another bone.  She was just so frail and not quite stable on her feet.  

I spent the rest of the afternoon talking to my children, explaining what happened and just feeling sad.  My parents have had a lot of serious health issues in this past fifteen months.  I wish they would have moved to assisted living or at least hired home healthcare, but I realize that this is not their plan.  I hope neither one ends up in the nursing home long term, but I know that I cannot do anything about it.  I have to take care of my own health so that I can help Doug navigate Parkinson's.  It will be a long journey for us, but we have already gotten off to a good start.

Game Day . . . Night

When Doug and I found out that IU's game with Northwestern would be played on a Friday night, we knew that it would fit perfectly into our travel timeline.  Doug would be able to use his last vacation day today and fly up last night for the game.  We would also be able to leave after the game and drive part of the way home getting us back a day early.  The best part was, however, that we would be able to go to Cora's birthday tailgate and celebrate with her family.

The one part that we hadn't thought about was what to do with our free day today.  We had been to Bloomington a lot lately and walking down Kirkwood wasn't as appealing as it was Labor Day weekend.  We had also visited Oliver Winery multiple times and didn't feel a need to return there today.  I did get us vouchers for breakfast at the Hilton we were staying at that included a buffet with mimosas and Bloody Marys, so we knew that our morning was covered.  

Since Cameron was busy with work and setting up at the tailgate fields, which opened at noon today, Doug suggested spending our free time at Nashville.  I hadn't thought about that and was very excited to go.  I had not been shopping there in over a year and loved all of the quaint shops.  The weather was beautiful which made our walk through the town even better.  We didn't buy anything, but we did enjoy window shopping, and Doug found one winery to try.  I also got a great book recommendation that I am going to purchase in October.

Doug and I made it to Memorial Stadium in plenty of time to find parking before the game.  We hung out for a while near our spot enjoying the atmosphere before heading to the Zink family tailgate.  There was a large group already assembled by the time we arrived, and everyone was having a great time.  We spent the next few hours talking to Cora's parents and her grandma.  We caught up with Cameron and had a lot of fun watching everyone celebrate with ski shots.  It was so nice to be included and to get one last night with Cameron.  It had been a great week and an awesome day today, but I was ready to go home after the game as I definitely could use the rest.

Cora's Birthday Dinner

I made it to Bloomington in time to check into our hotel and pick Cameron up from his last class of the afternoon.  He hadn't eaten lunch yet, so I treated him to Tropical Smoothie.  I enjoyed hearing about his week and his plans for the weekend. After I dopped Cameron off at Cora's, I headed to Indianapolis to pick up Doug.  It took a while for everyone to get off of the plane, so we got back to Bloomington a little bit later than I had planned.  Cora and Cameron didn't mind as they both had homework to finish.

Since Cora's 22nd birthday is tomorrow, we offered to take her out to dinner.  She picked the Farm, but they were packed.  Cameron suggested Malibu Grille which was close by and we were happy to hear that they could seat us.  We all ordered different margaritas to drink, and I was glad that I got the "skinny" one as even it was strong.  Doug tried the "spiciest one that he had ever had" while Cora and Cameron picked fruit-based ones.  We had not eaten at the steak house since we were in college and loved our meals.  While we were there, Cora opened her gifts from us.  She correctly guessed that Grandma had gotten her dark chocolate, which she loved.  She was also very happy with the wristlet we gave her with money inside and the bottle of perfume that Cameron found for her.  It was a wonderful evening and a fantastic kickoff to Cora's birthday.

Hanging Out with My Mom

My mom told me through tears this morning that she was very sad that I was leaving tomorrow.  I felt bad but knew that I couldn't stay.  I had commitments with my own family and would need to head out tomorrow as planned.  I did remind her that she hears from me almost every day and that when I am here, we get to spend way more time together than if I lived in town.  I also added Hoosier to her collection so she remembered that we were always thinking of her.

I did get to spend a lot of time with my mom today. I not only took her along with me to Newcomer's Jewelry in Nappanee, but I also asked her to show me where we lived on Elm Street when I was first born and where her house was when she was growing up.  I really enjoyed the trip down memory lane.  I would have never found our old house.  I was sure that it was in a different location.  Now I will never forget.  I probably would have been able to pick out her childhood home, or at least the area, but I appreciated hearing her talk about her memories from that time period and learning that Aunt Dolly lived just down the street from her family.

Distance can be tough, but I believe that I have navigated it the best that I can.  Doug and I always had plans to move south when our children graduated.  I didn't realize that it would be the day Cameron left for college but knew that it would be sometime within that year.  I miss my family in the Midwest but do enjoy our life in Ocala.  Thankfully, the phone call, texts and frequent travel make it a lot easier.   

Getting a Few Things Done

I arrived in Syracuse yesterday before lunchtime.  I was surprised to see that my parents weren't at home.  They were in Goshen shopping at Walmart.  It was my mom's third time out of the house since she broke her hip in July.  While they were out, I unpacked my car.  There wasn't a lot but enough to keep me busy.  I then left for my haircut at Amanda's.  It was nice to see her and catch up on what she had been up to since I was there a month ago.  It was also very nice to get my haircut as it seems to be growing faster than ever.

Today, I was able to take care of another item on my Indiana to-do list - the eye doctor.  Dr. Caughill is the only doctor that I still visit in the Midwest.  I know I won't be able to see him forever, but I really like him and trust his medical knowledge.  The appointment went well and I should have a new year's supply of contacts delivered next week.  

The last item that I needed to take care of was loading up the Pilot.  I started on that process today.  The car was fairly full from all of the tailgating supplies that we were bringing back from Brett's, but thankfully there was still enough room for Grandma's golf clubs, a wicker basket and a few other memory items that I still had stored at my parents.  After this trip, I should be done traveling to Indiana for a while by vehicle, so I was glad that I was able to fit it all in today.

A Day of Rest

After my late-night trip to the ER last night, we all decided to sleep in until 10 AM yesterday morning. Brett and Karen never knew what happened which was a little bit funny since the last two times I have been in Columbus I have had to call 911 as they slept through the excitement.  Once they got back from mas, the six of us decided to have an early lunch at McAlister‘s. It was really nice to get to spend some time with everyone before they headed out and Doug had to fly back to Florida. I still didn’t feel the greatest but was tremendously better than last night. 

After we said our goodbyes, I dropped Doug off at the Indianapolis airport yesterday afternoon. I was sad to see him go, but thankful that he would return on Thursday night. I next headed to Paula's and enjoyed a wonderful, relaxing afternoon and evening with her. She had just remodeled her back porch and it was gorgeous. They not only had the perfect outdoor sitting space, but a swim spa and hot tub as well. It would be so wonderful to have something like it at our home, but completely impractical for our neighborhood. Paula and I took advantage of her new patio and spent the next eight hours talking about anything and everything. It was so incredibly nice. Gabrielle joined us later in the day and I loved hearing her thoughts on the football game yesterday. We both laughed that I was the only one that wasn't drinking and ended up in the hospital anyway. 

When it grew dark, Paula suggested a local pub for dinner, and I absolutely loved their Beef Manhattan.  I hadn’t eaten very much over the past few days, so the comfort food was perfect for last night. We ended our evening in her living room, finishing up so many conversations. I was sad to go to bed, but tired enough that knew I would fall right to sleep

An Unexpected Trip to the ER

Yesterday was so much fun, but extremely hot.  The temperature on the field was one hundred degrees, and it wasn't much cooler when we got to the stands. I was glad that the shade arrived shortly after halftime on our side, but everyone else baked in the sun for most of the game.  Because of the heat and the fact that IU was dominating in the second half, I wasn't surprised when Cal, Maggie, Nick and Meg decided to skip the fourth quarter and watch the rest of the game at the Vault instead.  Doug and I left early as well but hung out at the tailgate until Brett and Karen arrived.  I was impressed that they made it the entire game.  Cameron arrived just as we were finishing packing up.  We gave him his backpack and said our goodbyes before picking up Cal and Maggie to head back to Columbus. The rest of the night was a quite one as we were all exhausted from such a busy day.

At 1:30 a.m. this morning, I woke up with a horrible pain in my left shin.  I wasn't too worried at first as I had had that happen before and ice always helped.  By the time I got back to bed from grabbing an ice pack from the freezier, the pain had traveled to my arms, chest and back.  It felt as though someone was squeezing me.  It was hard to breathe so I got out my pulse/ox finger monitor and was concerned that my heart rate was at 122.  I waited a few seconds to see if it would go down.  Instead, my oxygen level dropped to 85 and my jaw started hurting.  I called 911 and woke Doug up.  They sent an ambulance right away and Doug had Maggie come in and check on me.  I was definitely scared that I was having a heart attack.  

EMS arrived relatively quickly and put an EKG monitor on me.  My concern grew even more when they said that it was abnormal and they were taking me to the hospital.  Cal, Maggie and Doug all followed behind and over the next few hours I was run through a battery of tests.  We were all surprised that they did not start fluids right away especially since it was hard for them to find a vein to draw blood.  We all assumed that it was dehydration and were frustrated that they didn't just treat me for that.  Thankfully, they did not.  The blood work showed that I had extremely low potassium.  Extra fluid could have made it drop even lower.  They gave me double the dose of potassium that I normally take, and I soon felt a little better. 

The ER doctor really wanted me to stay at the hospital for a few days and do a stress test.  Since I wasn't in immediate danger, Doug and I decided to go ahead and leave once we knew the medicine had worked.  I definitely plan to go to see Dr. Aich when I get back to Florida.  I trust her and I know that she will take it seriously.  It was definitely a scary situation and not something that I will forget for quite some time.  

A Special Game

I didn't think that any football game that I was at in person would top last year's IU vs. UCLA game in which Cameron was introduced as an SAB director on the field.  It was such a special day.  We not only got to tailgate with Cal, Maggie, Brett, Karen, Cameron and Parce's family, but also got to be on the field with Cameron while he was honored.  To make the game even more special we were part of the Indiana flag ceremony and were front row eyewitnesses to the opening drive pick six by Aiden Fisher.  

As wonderful as that day was, nothing compared to this year's event as our entire family chose to come and support Cameron on his big day on the IU field.  Doug and I both had so much fun at the tailgate with all of our children, their significant others and Gabrielle joining our family gathering.  There wasn't any pick six to start the game, but Cal, Doug and I all got to join Cameron in the Indiana flag ceremony and on the goal line when he was introduced once again.  It was incredibly special knowing that our entire family was in attendance.  As we walked out of the weight room, Cal put his arm around Doug and said, "End of an era."  I almost sobbed when I heard that.  I appreciate all of my family being there as this will be a memory for me that I will never forget.  For that I am eternally grateful.

A Wonderful Day in Bloomington

After driving all afternoon and most of the evening yesterday, Doug and I were extremely thankful for a relaxing day in Southern Indiana.  Since both Karen and Brett had to work, we decided to leave as soon as we got up to stay out of their way.  Our first stop was Walmart where we picked up supplies for the tomorrow's tailgate and then were off to Bloomington.  Doug and I spent our morning walking around campus, checking out the shops on Kirkwood, buying a few vinyls at the record store and having an early lunch at Uptown Cafe.  We had never been and all of our children raved about it.  I was expecting breakfast food since it was a cafe, but instead found a menu filled with jambalaya type dishes.  Doug chose red beans and rice while I picked the hummus plater.  Both were delicious.  We found a friend to enjoy our day with us, and everyone loved the picture of Doug's new lunch buddy, Hoosier the Bison.

After lunch, we picked up Meg and Nick at The Graduate.  They had arrived earlier in the day and were looking forward to an afternoon at Oliver Winery.  Cameron got off work early so that he and Cora could join us as well.  The five of them had a lot of fun trying different wines while I enjoyed my chocolate torte dessert. We had a few bees join our table but kept them away from the wine with coasters on the glasses.  The funniest part was the stink bug that seemed to love Nick.  While we were there, we listed to the trivia questions and got some great pictures of Hoosier before it rained.

Doug and I returned to Columbus after we dropped everyone off in Bloomington.  Gabrielle arrived shortly after we left and joined Nick, Meg and Cameron at the bars this evening.  While Cal and Meg were debating Social Cantina vs. Hacienda in the group chat again tonight, Brett, Karen, Doug and I went to Chicago Pizza for dinner.  The food was good and we enjoyed the conversation.  We spent the rest of the night playing Ticket to Ride Germany before heading to bed in anticipation of our early morning wake up call.