We Don't Have to Overshare

When we found out definitively that Doug had Parkinson’s, I made a commitment to prioritize his health. I also made a commitment not to make this our entire life. It didn’t need to be everything we talked about or everything we did. It wasn’t because I was embarrassed by the diagnosis or that I didn’t believe it, but because I wanted to protect our mental health. I knew that we had to get back to our life. Doug‘s neurologist at Mayo Clinic told us that he could be in this stage for quite some time.  Thus, talking about it constantly, especially to other people, didn’t make a lot of sense. I knew that it would only make me worry more about the future.

Knowing that I didn't want Parkinson's to be the main topic of every one of my conversations, I didn't even mention Doug's diagnosis when I went out with Robbi and her friend Barbara today for lunch at Carrabba‘s. Instead, I talked about my frustration with finding a place for all our family to stay next summer for wedding. I asked them about their experience with VRBO.  We talked about CCW and even things as simple as what temperature to keep our air-conditioning on during the hot summer months in Florida. It was nice to just hang out and feel like a normal person not the wife of somebody with a neurological progressive disorder.

I am glad I figured out several years ago that I have control over the topics that I chose to share.  Our life will definitely be changed by Parkinson’s, but it doesn’t have to change today.  With so many positive things going on in our life there is no need to dwell on the hardships.  

A New Windshield and A New Problem

When Doug was at the Honda dealer getting his oil changed and his brake fluid replenished recently, they met with him about replacing his windshield.  There were a few chips in it, but since it didn't hinder Doug from seeing out the front window, he wasn't too worried about it.  The representative from Auto Glass explained that in Florida we pay through our insurance for windshield replacement free of cost.  The premium is higher, but we could technically replace the windshield every week if needed without our insurance rate going up.  When Doug heard that, he decided to go ahead and replace it.  Auto Glass helped him file the claim with State Farm and he set the date for replacement last week.

Auto Glass was on time and replaced the windshield quickly.  Doug didn't drive it much over the weekend, but when he did, he had no problems.  On Sunday, he left for Meg's and a strange message appeared on his dashboard. His cruise control also stopped working.  We found out later that it was because the camera attached to the top of the windshield was no longer calibrated correctly.  Since this was guaranteed with Auto Glass, we called them right away.  They made an appointment to come out and fix it correctly.  

Friday was the appointment and all seemed to go well until the cruise control stopped working again on Doug's trip to Orlando last night.  Thankfully, he has learned how to drive without the cruise control although it is a slower process since he has to take his foot on and off the gas pedal to keep his leg from tremoring on the drive.  Since it stopped working the second time, Auto Glass agree to replace the new windshield as well.  Fingers crossed that it will work the next time.  I don't know if we have a lot of faith in them, but hopefully, there will be no problems with the next windshield.  

Uptown Cheapskate

Meg, Doug, and I went to McAlister‘s after mass today. Before we headed into the restaurant, Meg stopped in at a new thrift store that we had been to a couple of times called Uptown Cheapskate. She had a bag of clothes that she wanted to sell, and I added couple of things of Cameron’s that he was interested in getting rid of as well. All of them were in nice shape, but we weren’t really sure how the process worked for reselling at the thrift store.

The three of us ate lunch while they were checking our clothes. Meg went back in afterward to do a little shopping, and I got a text shortly afterward saying that they were done sorting our clothes. We were both surprised to see that they had given us $21 for seven items, including one of Cameron shirts. We thought that was a great deal as it was a lot more than we could sell them for the garage sale. They gave us back what didn’t sell which we earmarked for eBay. As an added bonus, Meg found a matching overnight bag to her Vera Bradley backpack. It was a great price and we both walked out of the store extremely happy.

Meg's Visit

With Nick in Ohio for training this month, Meg decided to come out tonight to hang out with us.  She had gone over to a friend's last night and was ready for a relaxing evening in Ocala.  Doug made bruschetta for dinner, and I had a lemon bundt cake ready for dessert.  Phil stopped by later in the evening and we all moved out on the back patio to watch soccer.  Meg quizzed Phil on his thoughts about Olivia Rodrigo, and I questioned him on why he would ask which Grandpa threw out the SNES game system.  Overall, it was a wonderful evening at home, and I was very thankful that Meg made the time to come out.  I know that she has been very busy with work, so it was very appreciated.  

Friday at Home

Doug has four weeks of vacation this year and for the first time in forever, he will be able to use it all. Even though four weeks sounds like a lot of time, we still had to plan and write down dates to make sure that we didn’t take too much. A lot of people at his work have five weeks because they have been then five years or more.  Doug isn’t there yet, but we’re not complaining about the four he does have.

Since California took up five of the days and Doug had taken other days off during the year, there were six more days for him to use before September 30. When we got back from Indiana, I got out our calendar for the summer and fall, and we started making our plans. We knew that we wanted to keep a couple of days for September because of football games and two days in July to go up and visit the boys. After putting those on the schedule, we were left with two more days to plan. Doug left one for August and decided that he would use one today as well.

I wasn’t really sure what we would do since we had no plans for his day off, but in the end, it was such a blessing to have Doug here for a chill day at home. We watched movies, worked on Legos, saw all of the soccer games, listened to vinyls and hung out on the back porch when the sun went down. After traveling to so many places this spring, it was very nice just to be home and relax which we both appreciated very much.

Verbal Dyslexia

There have been many times over the past few years that Cameron, Cal or Doug have told me that I am Bill Simmons, their favorite podcaster.  I can see that as we are close to the same age and have a lot of the same interest in specific movies.  He also saw Jaws in the theater when it first came out along with several other films that were not age appropriate.  He survived as did I, so I figured it just made us tougher.

The one undeniable similarity that I cannot deny is the amount of times that we both misspeak in everyday conversation.  Wrong word, wrong name, wrong meaning, it doesn’t matter, he mispronounces them all. One day when a younger co-host corrected him on the pronunciation of a name, he told them that he had verbal dyslexia so he would probably never get it right.  They asked him if it was a real thing.  He laughed and said he didn’t know, but if it was, he definitely had it.

I also laughed when he said it as that would explain a lot about me as well.  I had been mispronouncing words for as long as I could remember speaking.  When I taught, my students got so used to it that I overheard one of them tell a new kid, “It’s Mrs. Heinisch, just go with it” when I called him the wrong name for several days.  I appreciated that sentiment.  My own children have adopted a version of that over the years as well.  Several of them have said that they “speak Mom” so I don’t have to explain every time I say the wrong thing.  Even my Google Home Mini has adapted to my mispronunciations over the years.  

For some reason I decided today to lookup if verbal dyslexia was a real diagnosis.  This was the definition that showed up on my phone.  I don’t know if it was real or not, but it did explain my issues with speech perfectly, especially the last statement.  I do think a lot faster than I speak and it does trip me up all of the time.  I don’t know if there is a cure for verbal dyslexia, but I wouldn’t care if there was.  Just like with Bill Simmons, those who know me best just “go with it” and for that I am very thankful.

Hinge Health

Over a year ago, I started doing physical therapy on an app that our insurance recommended.  At the time I was struggling with a lot of pain in my neck, shoulder and back.  I also had a hard time walking long distances without pain in my legs and feet.  I was skeptical if the app would help, but figured that it couldn’t hurt and I had nothing to lose since my insurance paid for it.  After asking me multiple questions, Hinge provided me with a list of exercises to do that would help.  Once I completed five weekly sessions four weeks in ago, they also sent me an Enso machine that provided direct relief to the nerve pain in my neck, back and shoulder.

Today, I received the message that I had completed the education portion of Hinge and could now exercise on my own.  I was very proud of that and even more so of all of the work that I had done this past year to decrease my pain and to move more.  Doug had noticed a huge difference in how long I could walk and how well I could keep up with him.  I still had pain in my neck and shoulders when I slept, and my feet and legs would still ache at times after waking or standing for a while, but overall I was doing a lot better.  I do not plan to stop working on my health, but it was nice to know that I had reaped the reward of my hard work.