A Little Bit Sad

I definitely had the Monday blues today. Doug left last night to spend three nights in Orlando. It made a lot of sense because he had a lot to do at work this week and I was glad because Meg was ready for some company with Nick still at training.  Unfortunately for me, it did make the house really quiet last night and today and it also gave me a ton of time to think which sometimes is not the best thing.

My thoughts turned toward the holiday weekend and how much I have always loved the Fourth of July.  For our family, it was one of the best celebrations of the year. Everyone always had a three-day weekend, and we took multiple trips together because of it. We also had so much fun celebrating Doug‘s birthday in places like St. Louis, Washington DC, and even Bloomington. Today, I realized that this year's celebration, although very nice, wasn’t quite what it was years ago. It made me sad. I was very happy for the boys that they had someone to share the holiday with in the Midwest and had started some new traditions of their own, but I did miss them a lot.  I would never want to take that away from them, but it would have been nice to be together as a family.

Maybe next year, I’ll come up with a plan where we all can meet. If not, I’ll just look forward to our time together on non-holiday weekends.  This summer we are fortunate to visit the Midwest twice, once last month and then this next week. I have learned over the past few years that it’s OK to be sad and to mourn things from long ago, but it’s never OK to dwell in it. Thus, after today, I will put that feeling aside and focus on the positives.

A Wonderful 4th of July for All

Our Fourth of July/Doug’s birthday celebration ended the way all good for Fourth of July weekends should with a big screen showing of the movie Jaws. It has been a family tradition for longer than I can remember and I look forward to it more and more each year. Cameron let us know this weekend that he had never seen Jaws 2, so we added that to our list of things to do with him in August when he visits us in Florida.

Doug and I weren’t the only ones enjoying the Fourth of July weekend. Brett and Karen hosted her parents and the four of them had a wonderful time walking in the holiday parade. They also went to Brown County, played games and watched movies as well. Cal and Maggie spent the weekend in Michigan with her family. Unfortunately, a storm knocked out power for several days. That changed some of their plans, but they still had a great time anyway. Meg not only visited us on Doug‘s birthday but went to a CeeLo Green concert with a friend. I was glad to hear that she still had fun even though Nick was in the Midwest for training this holiday weekend. Cameron went to Fishers and hung out with Cora‘s family. They had neighborhood fireworks as well and made some really fun holiday drink drinks.

I missed the boys a lot this weekend but was so glad to hear that they all had a wonderful Fourth of July celebrating America's 250th. I was also very thankful to have Doug and Meg here in Ocala. It made the weekend a lot of fun.

Finding the Perfect Gift

Doug had a great 56th birthday celebration. Phil and Meg were able to join us for dinner which, of course, included brats a Heinisch family staple. Doug also made a carrot cake which was a big hit for dessert. The fireworks in our neighborhood this year were a nice addition to our party, but maybe just a little bit too close as someone was shooting them off in the retention pond right across the street. 

I had a really had time picking out a gift for Doug's birthday this year. He didn't really have any ideas for me and told me that he liked what I gave him for Father’s Day if I wanted to do something like that again. I didn’t want to just give him the same gifts that I had a month ago and hoped to come up with something a little bit more original. I knew that the gifts from my children were fantastic and I didn’t want to upstage them but still wanted to find something that I thought Doug would like. I spent a lot of time looking at different ideas online and then it finally dawned on me. Doug really needed a duffel bag. He traveled a lot and always had to take a carry-on suitcase even for an overnight stay. I found one that I liked online and then went to Publix to pick up the perfect bottle of alcohol to go with it. After looking through everything and even talking to their friendly store clerk, we both agreed that I couldn’t go wrong with a bottle of Jack Daniels. 

I am very happy to say that Doug did like the duffel bag filled with Jack Daniels and candy. It didn’t quite top Vitalogy on vinyl from Pearl Jam, but that was OK because no one was going to top Meg's gift this year.  She easily took that honor with what I believe to be the best gift Doug has ever gotten when she found the exact same Six-Million-Man lunchbox that Doug had in first grade that he talked so fondly about over the years. He was absolutely speechless when he pulled it out of the bag and it now holds a special spot in our living room instead of in his memory.  

The best part for Doug was that he still had two more gifts to open. Brett had sent him an Edi Amin book which I know he will absolutely love reading, especially from all of his years of saying, "I'm Edi Amin" when knocking on a door. Cameron had also picked up some great sauces for him to try and even a Mudhens souvenir. Meg definitely trumped us all this year with her gift, but the boys and I still came through with some really nice ones as well.

An Early Birthday Celebration

For Christmas, Maggie gave us a gift certificate to the World Equestrian Center. It was valid at any of their restaurants, and we decided that we would save it for a special occasion. I had suggested Mother’s Day or Father’s Day, but we ended up celebrating both of those holidays at Disney World, leaving tonight as the perfect time to use it for an early birthday celebration for Doug’s 56th.

I checked Open Table for restaurants at the WEC that were available this evening and I was surprised to see that they had a new restaurant cleverly named The Red Pony which looked like it had the perfect menu for both Doug and I. I quickly made a reservation, and we left the house this evening at 4:30 ready to try out this highly rated venue.

There was some confusion getting to the restaurant as Apple Maps sent us to The Yellow Pony instead. Thankfully, we had left early enough to arrive just in time for our 5 o’clock reservation. The restaurant was appropriately themed with paintings of horses everywhere. Some were characterizations of horse and others were of famous animals from the WEC‘S glory days of horse showmanship. We were pleased to see that our table was perfectly placed by the window, and our server was absolutely wonderful.

After looking through the drink menu, I picked one called The Pink Pony Club which honored the famous Chappell Roan song well by being one of the most delicious drinks that I have ever had. Dinner was equally wonderful with amazing dishes, and lots of fun conversation. The highlight of the evening was definitely dessert. When I made the reservation on OpenTable, it asked if we were celebrating a special occasion. I put down Doug’s birthday without even thinking about it. I was so glad as the wait staff went out of their way to celebrate Doug’s 56th birthday with us complete with a birthday card and a lighted firework on top of Doug's s’mores cheesecake. We may have been a day early for the celebration, but that didn’t matter to us. It was a wonderful night and one that we will not forget for quite some time.

VRBO Disaster

When we got Morgan's wedding announcement, I decided that I would go ahead and book our hotel rooms even though I wasn't quite sure if all of our family could make it. With the wedding happening on a Friday, Nick starting a new job, Brett and Karen talking about having children and Cameron unsure of his future after graduation, it was definitely hard to plan ten months out. Even so, I thought that it wouldn't hurt to go ahead and book rooms for all of us knowing that I would be able to cancel some of them if need be.  

Even though I looked for lodging as soon as I got the announcement, I wasn't able to find enough rooms for our family at the preferred hotel.  The three rooms that were available had a no cancellation policy which did not work for us.  Unfortunately, there weren't a lot of other hotel choices in the area with open rooms either. Plus, those hotels were all north of the venue meaning those in our family that were arriving on the wedding day would have to drive even further north to change before the ceremony.

Hearing that I had no luck with the hotels, Cal suggested that I try VRBO.  We had never stayed in one before but knew a lot of people who had.  Nick helped me with the website and soon I found a five-bedroom house fifteen minutes from the wedding venue that would be perfect for us or so I thought.  Shortly after booking, the nightmare began.  VRBO cancelled my booking due to a payment error on their end.  Even so the owner of the rental went ahead and charged me a $375 deposit anyway which meant that VRBO wouldn't guarantee the stay.  It was like renting from a random person which made all of us uncomfortable.  I emailed the owner right away and was assured that I would be refunded immediately which never happened.

Two weeks later, I am still trying to get my money back.  I have heard nothing back from the owner and VRBO said that there isn't anything that they can do about it.  Thankfully, I was able to file a claim with my credit card company and have all of the email messages to help back my case.  The other good news is that I found a Hampton Inn about twenty-five minutes south of the wedding where we can all stay.  Even better, I can cancel up until the night before meaning that no one has to decide today and I can get my money back if something happens.  Needless to say, I have decided that VRBO and Airbnb aren't for me and plan on staying with the Hilton chain from here on out.  

Cleaning Grout is Not For the Weak

Several months ago, I bought a steam cleaner to use on our glass shower doors.  I could clean the water spots off of them without it, but it took a lot of work.  I saw a reel that suggested using a steam cleaner, so after more research, I thought I'd try it.  It worked well and did cut down on the amount of time it took to clean the shower doors.

While I was getting the steamer ready to use, I realized that it had a brush for grout cleaning.  I have a ton of tile in my house and although I kept the floors clean, I knew that the grout had not been thoroughly scrubbed since we moved in three years ago.  My handyman suggested using Stanley Steamer to do it, but once I saw the quote for $360, I decided to find a way to do it myself with my new steam cleaner.

I first tried the cleaner on the front porch, and it made a big difference. Every week since then, I put on my to-do list, "clean bathroom grout," but something got in the way.  Finally last May, I was ready to work on the bathroom tile when I got an email that the attachments were being recalled because they would slip off easily causing burns.  I knew from experience that they were right and waited for the new parts to arrive.

Today was the day that I got the steam cleaner out and started on the bathroom tile.  It took a lot of work and way more time that I thought that it would, but they looked a hundred times better in the end.  After all of that work, I decided that I couldn't do the rest of the tile in the house with just the steam cleaner and started looking at grout brushes.  I hope it makes the job even easier.  No matter what, it was nice to know that I had come up with a solution for several hundred dollars less than Stanley Steemer.  I would much rather but the elbow grease in at home and use that money for our trip to the Midwest later this month.

We Don't Have to Overshare

When we found out definitively that Doug had Parkinson’s, I made a commitment to prioritize his health. I also made a commitment not to make this our entire life. It didn’t need to be everything we talked about or everything we did. It wasn’t because I was embarrassed by the diagnosis or that I didn’t believe it, but because I wanted to protect our mental health. I knew that we had to get back to our life. Doug‘s neurologist at Mayo Clinic told us that he could be in this stage for quite some time.  Thus, talking about it constantly, especially to other people, didn’t make a lot of sense. I knew that it would only make me worry more about the future.

Knowing that I didn't want Parkinson's to be the main topic of every one of my conversations, I didn't even mention Doug's diagnosis when I went out with Robbi and her friend Barbara today for lunch at Carrabba‘s. Instead, I talked about my frustration with finding a place for all our family to stay next summer for wedding. I asked them about their experience with VRBO.  We talked about CCW and even things as simple as what temperature to keep our air-conditioning on during the hot summer months in Florida. It was nice to just hang out and feel like a normal person not the wife of somebody with a neurological progressive disorder.

I am glad I figured out several years ago that I have control over the topics that I chose to share.  Our life will definitely be changed by Parkinson’s, but it doesn’t have to change today.  With so many positive things going on in our life there is no need to dwell on the hardships.