Life Changer

Over the past two weeks I have had a lot of time to reflect on the conversation that I had with my gastroenterologist and the session that I had with my therapist.  One item that was causing a lot of stress in my life came to light during those appointments.  I was spending almost all of my time and energy making sure that no one had to deal with the natural consequences of their actions.  For years, I had been anticipating every bad outcome that could occur from a decision that someone in our family made and sometimes even trying to guess all of the different decisions that they could make beforehand so I could prevent anything negative from happening. It made sense to me why I was doing this, but realistically it wasn’t really helping anyone.  People learn best from dealing with the consequences of their choices, good or bad.  By preventing that from happening, they weren’t learning anything and I was destroying my health.  I had taken steps last July to step back from this behavior, but until the doctor explained exactly how doing this was a direct physical cause of pain for me, I knew that I had to stop completely.  

Because of this, I have let go of the guilt of not going the extra mile for others and instead have started to focus on myself.  For the past two weeks, I have exercised daily, watched what and how I ate, put my interests first and set boundaries.  The difference has been amazing.  I have only experience severe pain a few times in the past two weeks.  I have lost weight.  I sleep better and I am happier.  I wish that I would have understood that this behavior was making me sick a long time ago, but am thankful that I understand it now.  It has definitely been a life changer.  

Surgery Success

My dad's surgery to remove the sarcoma in his right bicep was yesterday and I was happy to hear that it went very well.  There were multiple outcomes that could have occurred including amputation, nerve damage or loss of the use of his hand.  The surgeon was very pleased to relay to my dad that none of those had happened.  Instead, my dad got the best-case scenario, removal of the tumor and muscle without disturbing the vascular or nervous system.  He was obviously extremely relieved to hear that news.

I really appreciated that Aunt Susie and Uncle Dean were able to take him yesterday and pick him up this afternoon.  It was very nice to have a family member there who was positive and could let us know what was happening before my dad woke up.  Hopefully, now my dad can focus on healing and recovering.  It will take some work in rehab and several follow-up appointments, but thankfully, the worst is behind him now.

The Hidden King

Since we finished the book of Isaiah during the Lenten season, our Bible study leader suggested that we spend three weeks studying Saint Joseph.  I was very excited about that as I didn't know a lot about him besides being a carpenter and Jesus' father.  The video that we were using for our studies was divided in three parts and was titled The Hidden King. I thought that was very interesting as I had most often heard of him as The Forgotten Saint.  We listened to the first part last week which focused on the lineage of Joseph and his relationship to King David.  There was also a lot of discussion regarding Herod who was the king of Jerusalem.  He was a horrible person and was responsible for killing all male Jews under the age of two after he found out about Jesus' birth. It was very difficult to listen to at times because of Herod's cruelty.

This week's lesson focused on the story of Joseph and Mary's betrothal and marriage as well as Jesus' conception.  It was absolutely fascinating.  It not only gave us information about relationships during that time period but also gave Biblical verses that supported the Catholic Church's beliefs surrounding the lives of Joseph and Mary. There were verses that showed that Mary remained a virgin her entire life, it dated Joseph's age and it explained perfectly the question about Jesus' "brothers."  I thoroughly enjoyed the video and the discussion that followed.  I will miss the last session next week but should be able to finish on my own later.  If not, I am so happy with what I learned today.  It was truly enlightening.  

The Plant Debate Continues

Since Doug and I first bought our home in Naperville, we have always disagreed on how to trim our bushes.  He has always liked our landscaping to look natural with only minor trimming several times a year.  I one the other hand preferred to have all bushes shaped and kept small.  It made sense that our opinions differed.  The landscaping at his parents' home was large almost covering the front of the home.  Ours was always kept small so the house was in open view.

At first, we followed more of Doug's thoughts on the landscaping.  That seemed fair to me since he did most of the yardwork.  Once he started traveling more and I got involved, we changed to more of my way of thinking. I was very glad when we moved to Florida that Doug changed his opinion completely.  I didn't have to do much persuading either.  Once he saw that large bushes and brush near the house brough more bugs, lizards and snakes he agreed to minimal landscaping near the home and rock instead of mulch.

Our houseplants, on the other hand, have still continued to be a debate.  Doug likes to have them grow naturally, and I prefer them trimmed.  Since I take care of them, I agreed to leave two grow and prune the rest as I saw fit.  I had mentioned to him not to long ago that our angel wings plant was starting to take over the top shelf.  He wasn't quite ready for me to do anything about it yet but agreed to think about it.  I guess the plant had another idea.  This morning I woke up to it lying on the ground.  It had taken quite a fall from the top tier and lost many leaves and a few of the vines along the way.  I couldn't believe it.  The vines must have gotten too heavy.  I was able to replant what was left in another planter and get it back up on the shelf this afternoon.  After that mishap, Doug was fine with me doing research on all of the plants to see the best way to care for them even if it meant trimming a few more.  I was glad to hear that as I didn't want any more late-night free falls to happen to my beloved houseplants.  

The Masters

The past four days have been filled with Masters updates from our family group chat.  There were cheers, taunts, and disappointments shared among the twelve of us involved in the pool and many laughs as well.  Karen had chosen the fan favorite, Rory McIlroy, as her pick and was tied for the lead after three rounds.  The rest of us were cheering for other golfers and for a time it looked like my pick, Cameron Young, would be the winner as he started the day tied with Rory, but the pressure must have gotten to him as he couldn't make a putt. Maggie's pick, Justin Rose, climbed to the top before a few errant shots knocked him down to third.  Cora was the last lone one in our group to have any chance of catching Rory as her pick, Scottie Scheffler, came roaring back on the last nine, but unfortunately, he ran out of holes before he could send the tournament into a playoff.  

As a family we were divided on who were rooting for on the last few holes, some for Karen and others for Cora.  Either way it was a lot of fun and the closest Masters that I had watched in a long time. In the end, Karen was excited to have won our family pool, and I was thankful that everyone had a great time together even though we all lived miles apart.  

A Beautiful Change of Weather

Meg decided to leave for Orlando tonight after dinner, but we made the most of her visit these past two days before she left.  Last night, we picked up dinner from Publix and afterward sat outside on the back patio listening to vinyls. This morning, Meg and I went to the new thrift store by McAlister's.  I had been there on Thursday with Robbi, and I knew that Meg would really like it.  She found a few shirts for herself, and I even picked up two for me and a brand-new dress shirt for Doug.  

After lunch, Meg worked on her crafts while I helped Doug with a few things.  He left around 3 to meet Phil back at Hiatus.  They had just tapped the keg on their "beertini."  Meg and I weren't into the martini inspired beer and went for a walk at Sholom Park instead.  We were both thankful for the beautiful day.  It had been dreary and rainy in Florida this past week and sunshine was just what we needed.  The three of us went to dinner once everyone got back. I picked Las Margaritas so that we could sit outside and enjoy the end of the day.  We also did a little bit of shopping before we left Heath Brook Square where I found the perfect glasses for our game nights while Meg picked up duck ones for their collection.  Overall, it was a wonderful day, and we were very glad to have spent it with Meg.

Unexpected Turn of Events

Meg decided to come out today and hang out with us since Nick was flying.  It had been a while since she had stayed in Ocala, and it was very nice to have her here.  She and I went to Hobby Lobby when she first arrived to pick up crafting supplies for her and some front porch decorations for me.  It was packed, but we still had a lot of fun.

Doug was home early today as they had a company outing that got over at 2 p.m.  The three of us decided to ask Uncle Phil if he wanted to meet us at Hiatus in the late afternoon.  Neither Meg nor I had talked to him in a month and were surprised by his life change.  He had started volunteering at a local pet rescue where he would be walking dogs that were in need of a little exercise before they found their new forever owner.  He told us all about it and the dogs that he had walked so far.  It was neat to see the excitement in his eyes and nice to know that he really enjoyed it.  I had been very worried about him since he quit his job last year.  He didn't seem to have much interaction with others besides our family.  It was nice to know that he found something he loved that would give him a chance to get involved in his new community.