Heading to B-Town

Several months ago Brett asked me if I thought Cameron would be interested in going to Holiday World with him.  As I didn't know Cameron's schedule for the summer at that time, we decided to wait until closer to June to decide.  Cameron and I talked a few weeks ago and he was definitely up for a trip to Santa Claus, Indiana.  He had never been to Holiday World and wanted to give it a try.  We made plans to go to Bloomington today and stay for a few days.  Doug was going to be in Florida working that week so the timing was perfect.

Cameron and I left this afternoon for his second road trip of the week.  I let Cameron pick the music and we listened to Juice Wrld, Drake, Post Malone and more.  We also started the Rocky III Rewartchable.  That was very entertaining.  Brett got off work early tonight and we arrived just as he did.  It took a little while to unload the Pilot, but within a half an hour of pulling into his parking lot we were back on the road to Mother Bears.  It was absolutely deserted when we arrived and we soon had ordered a 10 inch Paulie Pine Nuts and a 10 inch chicken, feta, bacon pizza.  The food was delicious.  I enjoyed listening to Brett and Cameron talk about anything and everything.

I suggested Monopoly when we got back to Brett's apartment.  Cameron and I instantly regretted it.  Cameron jumped out to a big lead, but soon found himself bankrupt due to a couple of bad rolls.  It didn't take much longer for Brett to wipe me out as well.  Thankfully, we had a few We Bares Bears episodes to watch.  That was definitely a lot more fun for Cameron and I.  

A Weekend On Our Own

Cameron had plans for lunch on Friday and played golf early in the evening with Evan but said that he would be home that night to play Oh Hell.  He arrived just as Doug was finishing getting dinner ready and said, "Hey, Breece is at the Goshen College tennis courts, so I'm heading over there."  We had to laugh as we would have been surprised if he had stayed home.  Meg was the exact same way between her junior and senior year.

Once Cameron got home from tennis, he asked us if we would be ok with he, Samuel and Avery driving to Westfield to watch Jordan's soccer team play in regionals.  Jordan's family had offered for them to stay in their hotel Saturday night, so they could see the games on Sunday as well.  We thought it would be great for them to support Jordan.  They definitely had a lot of fun as they not only watched soccer, but played miniature golf and went out to eat several times as well.  

Cameron wasn't the only Heinisch busy this weekend.  Meg went out with the interns on Friday night and enjoyed visiting with everyone.  Nick came up for the day on Saturday.  It rained all day, but they were still able to take the train up to Wrigleyville and went out to eat several times before Nick had to leave.  Cal also enjoyed all that Chicago had to offer this weekend.  He had several friends come up for a visit.  They hung out on his rooftop deck and went out on Wells Street.  Brett enjoyed Friday night with Sean and Norman watching movies and catching up on the latest news.  He then did the same with Andrew on Saturday evening.  

With everyone busy, Doug and I had a weekend on our own.  We worked on a few projects, took several long walks, listened to our favorite vinyls, played Ticket to Ride along with several matches of corn hole, and watched Fatal Attraction outside on the big screen.  We also talked to Uncle Phil multiple times debating the best musical artists of the 1980s as well as our favorite movies.  It was definitely strange to spend the weekend with just Doug and I, but we did have fun.  Guess we'll have to get used to this as soon it will be that way everyday.

Roe v. Wade

Yesterday a news feed flashed across my iPhone announcing that Roe v. Wade had been overturned by the Supreme Court.  I shouldn't have been surprised as there had been a lot of talk about that happening this June.  I just honestly never thought that in my life time that it would occur.

Soon after the announcement, Meg started texting me.  There were a lot of memes, Tik Toks and Instagram posts slamming the decision.  One thing that surprised me from all of this was the fact that many in Meg's generation didn't understand that abortion was still legal, it just now became a states rights issue and not a federal mandate.  

That wasn't the only misinformation popping up on social media.  Several women argued that entoptic pregnancies could only be ended by abortion and now all of those women would die or that women who traveled to states that allowed abortions would be arrested when they returned home.  From my research, none of this seemed to be true.  Even in Utah, which had proposed the most restrictive abortion laws, exceptions were made for health concerns of the mother and victims of rape or incest.  Only doctors could be arrested for performing abortions outside of the states laws, not the mothers.

The other statement that I just couldn't understand was "My Body, My Choice."  In my opinion that totally negated the fact that the baby didn't have a choice with its body.  Even if the mother did not believe that a fetus was a baby until birth, didn't these women understand that they did have a choice?  They did not have to have unprotected sex.  That was definitely within their control.

Overall, I decided long ago not to have an opinion about abortion.  The topic was way too polarizing.  I do believe in what Pope Francis said about the ruling.  He said that being pro-life was not being anti-abortion.  It was to value all life including the health of the mother.  He also stated that being pro-life meant being in favor of laws to stop gun violence which had become one of the leading causes of death in children.  He said that it meant to be anti-death penalty and pro-adoption.  Those were all statements that I could get behind.  

A Surprise Afternoon Off

Doug called this morning to let me know that he was thinking of taking a half day off.  The power was out in Ocala, so most of his meetings had been cancelled.  He was caught up on his work and was ready for a break.  He didn't have to ask me twice.  I was glad to have him home on this beautiful day.  

I asked Doug on his way home what he wanted to do with his free afternoon.  He gave me a list of everything he wanted to accomplish - drop off Phil's rings at the jewelers, put another coat on the basement bathroom,  and work on the yard were just a few of the items on his to-do list.  I wasn't surprised to hear his agenda, but was glad that he also added take a walk, play Ticket to Ride, have a bonfire and grill out.  

Doug managed to accomplish all that he set out to do plus one more activity.  Last night he casually asked me who would win in a game of corn hole, him or I?  I think I might have laughed out loud when he asked the question.  Doug wasn't known for his mastery of the backyard game.  I was a little nervous when we played this afternoon, however, as all of the Heinisch children had let me know that it would be absolutely embarrassing if I lost.  Thankfully, I was able to rise to the challenge with a 21-3 victory.  In the end Doug didn't mind losing, he was just incredibly happy to have the afternoon off from work.  

Checking Out at 70

Cameron told me a couple of days ago that he thought that living past 70 would be too much for him.  In his opinion he felt that once someone hit their 70s that all they did was read the obituaries, talk about their health issues and complain about the weather.  He thought that you ought to be able to "check out" once you got to that age.  I had to laugh when he told me this.  I realized that he would probably feel different once he reached his 60s, but for now could understand how he arrived at that opinion.  

Cameron had spent a lot of time with my parents growing up and now that he was the only Heinisch child left in the house he got to spend even more time with them and us.  Last week I drove him nuts when I talked about all of the downed trees from the intense storm we had.  He has banned all talk about the weather and has even given orders that he will not receive any more snacks from anyone.  

I told my group of friends what Cameron thoughts were.  They thought it was funny.  Grandpa Cutes got a laugh out of it as well, especially when we reminded him about flinging his teeth across the Mexican restaurant floor on Mother's Day.  I'm not sure that Grandma Jane enjoyed Cameron's opinion, but that didn't get him to change it any.  I am glad that he enjoys his youth and hope that he continues to appreciate it for many more years to come.

Luncheon

A couple of weeks ago, I texted Mary to see if she was free for lunch anytime soon.  She suggested this week and asked if I wanted to contact a few of our other friends as well.  Paula, Wendy and Betsy agreed to join us at Oakwood this afternoon.  I was incredibly glad to see everyone.  I enjoyed listening to all that they had going on in their lives.  Paula had a new position at Wawasee.  Mary talked about Deea's upcoming wedding.  Betsy was starting to deal with the reality that after next year her house would be empty, and Wendy filled us in on all of that she had been doing with her dogs.  

I talked a lot about the past month in the Heinisch home - the ups and the downs.  I appreciated all of their support and thoughts on several issues that we had been dealing with lately.  I was also thankful for their excitement for the success of our children.  Paula gave me a lot of tips on what to do with Cameron as he continues his journey dealing with Richard's death.  Grief was something that she knew only too well.  All in all it was a fantastic lunch and I can't wait to do it again.  

A Tough Couple of Days

Last night Cameron played in the weekly tennis league.  He was paired at singles against Northridge's best player.  Cameron lost 6-1, 6-1.  Even with the score we were impressed with how he played as his opponent was far superior to anyone else we had seen this summer.  Cameron walked over to me after his loss and just started sobbing.  I instantly knew that it wasn't tennis that was bothering him.  Thus, I wasn't surprised when he said that he just wasn't in the right frame of mind to play.  Cameron said that he cried all of the way over to Nappanee.  He couldn't stop thinking about Richard. Cameron had bought a new album from their favorite rapper.  We had listened to it this afternoon.  It had triggered a lot of memories for Cameron.  All I could tell him after his match was that I was sorry.  I had no words to alleviate the pain that he had been going through this past month.  All I could do was cry with him.  I was incredibly thankful that Daniel realized that the best solution for Cameron was to pair him with Breece for the next match.  The competition wouldn't be as fierce and Cameron would not have as much time to think.  It definitely helped.

 Cameron had a golf match this afternoon that didn't go his way either.  He played well, but had five balls out of bounds.  That knocked him out of contention for qualifying for the state tournament.  I felt awful for him.  He seemed to handle it well, but later in the day he said that he became extremely overwhelmed on hole number four.  Thankfully, he remembered a tip that one of his doctors gave him - "You can't control your emotions, but you can control how you react to them."  That was fantastic advice and I was glad that Cameron was able to remember it as it made a huge difference in his day.

This evening, Cameron and I talked a lot about his feelings over the past few days.  We had some great conversations from everything to gun control, to death, to life, to prescription drug use, to friendships.  We didn't solve any of the world's problems, but in the end we both came to realize that there was no shortcut to grief and from now on we wouldn't look for one.