Deeper Than Most

As most of Bethany's tennis matches have been away this season I have spent quite a bit of time driving Cameron across Northen Indiana.  I haven't minded at all.  It has kept him out of the buses which I believe to be a higher COVID risk activity than most at the school.  The best part, however, has been the conversations that we have had along the way.  Most of the topics have revolved around Cameron's day at school, tennis, his friends, the NBA playoffs, the NFL, COVID and Star Wars memes.  Tonight's topic, however, was a little deeper than most as we spent our hour drive home talking about religion, God and the Bible.

Since Cameron was confirmed in the Catholic church and has attended a Mennonite school, he has gotten a wide variety of religious views of the years.  Just this week he spent time memorizing Jesus' sermon on the mount for Bible class.  Talking about religion hasn't been anything new in his life, but tonight we spent most of our conversation talking about how death can change one's opinion about God and the Bible.  Cam brought it up as one of his friend's views about religion had altered considerably after the death of a family member.  Cameron told me that he understood why his friend's opinion had changed and that it didn't really matter if he agreed with him or not.  Cam just wanted to be supportive as he felt that religious interpretation was up to each individual and no one should be judged for their religious beliefs.

I couldn't have agreed with Cameron more.  Living in the middle of the Bible belt we have definitely run across individuals and entire congregations that spent their religious life tearing down others' faith.  Over the years we have gotten used to it and try to avoid those situations overall.  The part of the conversation between Cameron and I that I found more fascinating was his friend's thoughts on religion after losing a loved one. I told Cam that I could relate to that easily.  

After my brother died we moved to a new town and my parents never really found a church to belong to until I was in college.  I tried a couple of different church services with friends when I was in middle school, but never really found one that fit.  Thus, I spent quite a bit of my childhood trying to have a relationship with God without being a member of a congregation.  I explained to Cameron that I was able to maintain faith in God even without formal religious education.  I never once blamed him for my brother's death and instead spent quite a bit of time praying about it instead.  For me I came to believe that everything in life happened for a reason which correlated with God's will.  I believed that was true even when the situation brought sadness into one's life.  This realization helped me to reconcile Bunk's death and to move forward in life instead of being depressed or angry about the past.  I knew that not everyone would agree with me, but that was ok.  I had to make peace with my brother's death in a way that worked for me.  Because I believed that God was a loving and forgiving being, I felt that He would be content with my decision.  I hoped that Cam's friend would come to the same opinion in time as well.  Either way I know that God's love still shines on him and his family.